The season of Thanksgiving and Christmas has been an unusually sad one this year.
A friend lost his mother, another sweet family said good-bye to their day old baby boy, and yesterday another family lost their four year old son.
Our hearts hurt for them, and we weep with them as they grieve their loved ones.
In all this there has been one unsettling theme that kept arising.
For the friend that lost his mother, Mr. Pepper was talking with him when a woman approached to share her sympathies and almost immediately started talking about how it was when she lost her father years ago, by the time she was finished talking our friend was the one trying to comfort her instead of the other way around.
I've been amazed at the comments I see on Facebook to the family who lost their baby. A lot of them are sweet, comforting, weeping with the family. But then there are others ..... one lady said. Be thankful you could hold him and say good-bye to him. My mother lost one of her twins and never even got to hold or say good-bye to her. The funeral was over before she was released from the hospital.
There were similar comments made to the family that lost their four year old. We have experienced the same. Some people simply don't know what to say to those who are hurting.
I think there's a reason the Bible says, "Weep with them that weep", instead of share all your sorrows and opinions with those that weep.
And it's a good idea to do just that. Weep with them, pray for them, give them a hug. Simply be there. Maybe someday in a year or two you can both talk about your experiences, but right now the grief is theirs, making it about something else is never a good idea.