Monday, November 10, 2014

Weird Like That

     When our children were still itty bitty babies, Mr. Pepper and I decided sleep overs, whether at our house or a friends house, would be out of the question for our children. In addition, playdates and afternoons spent at a friends house, including birthday parties, would only be allowed if one of us would be there as well.

      As the children grow older we find we have to turn down requests for sleep overs quite often. Most of the time the parents may seem a little taken aback, but are supportive. Others seem to have no problem telling me that we're depriving our children of experiences ever child should have.

       I don't usually go into detail why we think this is so important to us, but yesterday after church a certain grandmother came up to me to once again plead for my daughters to come spend the night at their house when her granddaughter is staying with them this weekend. Her husband has asked a few times as well. They are more persistent than any other family has ever been on this matter. I again tried to kindly say that, no, our family does not do sleep overs.

     "I don't know why you have to be weird like that," was her miffed reply.

      Weird like that ......... hmmm....... if this is considered to be weird I'm okay with being called weird. You see, Mr. Pepper's sister was molested as a child by people they had totally trusted, someone they didn't think for one instant would ever do something to hurt their children. We have seen first hand the horrible things that follow something like this, the lifetime of hurt, the trust issues, among so much more, and it is not a risk we are willing to take.

      As parents we want to protect our children to the best of our ability, for us that includes never having sleep overs. It's something that is simply not up for debate. If that makes us weird, so be it. I'll accept that title with no apologies.

10 comments:

  1. Oh, Mr's Pepper I totally agree. I mean I don't have kids yet but yes I am very protective even to my siblings. You'll never know. Molestations and abuse happen so rampantly that I'm surprised at least 4 out of 5 women I know were once abused. It's scary. And I thought I'd only see it on tv or in the news but no, it really happens. I support you 100%. Even if people call you weird, let them. It's not their children's lives you are protecting but yours. A little inconvenience today will go a long way.

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    1. That's how I feel too. I would much rather annoy other people, or even have them not like me, than put my children inn any risk. I'm a bit of a Mama Bear.

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  2. I think everyone is entitled to his/her opinion,and it is not right to accuse someone of being weird for not agreeing. Of course, one can never know the history behind the decisions, and it is really none of our business. It's a private matter, but your decision to make.

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    1. Thank-you! Another reason not to judge others, for unless we know everything they have ever been through we will never understand the reasons behind the things they do or don't do.

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  3. OK, so you explained it once and that should be it. They shouldn't come to you over and over again. That is just annoying. When my parenting came into question I just started to ask..."Now why in the world would you say something like that?!" and then I would be quiet. Often , they would realized they had crossed the line or they would answer why and then I would ask the same question again! After a while they would give up ...LOL!
    Blessings, Joanne

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    1. I like that response! I may have to try it next time, because I have a feeling this won't be the last time she says something.

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  4. I think you should be respected for your own decision. Good for you for sticking to your guns. So many people think that they know what is best for others and their children when it is actually none of their business. Whatever decisions you make, there will always be someone to question them. People can be so offended when we don't do what they think we should, but who cares? That's their problem.

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  5. I agree with you. I won't do it either.


    "I again tried to kindly say that, no, our family does not do sleep overs."

    This is really all that needs to be said.

    "I don't know why you have to be weird like that," was her miffed reply.

    Huh? A very disrespectful lady. Some friend!

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Awww, you just made my day! Thank-you for taking the time to comment.